Showing posts with label seminary life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label seminary life. Show all posts

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

mere ponderings


Internship is fast approaching.
The weeks seem to speed right by.
And I have yet to dig-in to packing up my house.


Empty boxes to the left and right of me.
A few that are full sit in the front hallway.
I have an attic scattered with trash and a basement consumed with stuff.


Babies are asleep in their beds making sounds of awakening.
I can hear the stir of their bodies against their sheets.


Major anticipation in my heart gives rise to excitement.
What will such an adventure hold?


New places, new people, and new lessons to explore.
God is ever blessing.
                          ever constant.
                                     ever sure.


Humbled-joy is what I feel.
To be allowed this life.

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

connections. they make it hard. and yet so easy.

So much to say.
So much has happened!
(I think.)
I've been busy being a wife and mom.  And can I tell you, that as soon as I forced myself to make my husband, kids, and home a priority, my attitude has significantly improved!  It's amazing.  When you take Titus 2:3-5 as seriously as you should (or the rest of God's word for that matter) and start putting it into practical practice...your life works.  huh.  who knew?

But here's the latest and greatest...

The first Thursday night in May, the seminary had it's annual banquet.  This year's theme was "Connections".  Meaning:  BBS is a place where you make those connections (with profs and friends) that will last and stand the test of time.  These people will be there whenever you need them most, for whatever the reason.  Those connections that will help make life easier when full-time ministry makes life hard. 

The interns that will be "going out"
 were asked to share the location of our placement
and a prayer request for the year.
Dr. Mappes was the key-note speaker that night.  And that's basically what he spoke on.  I couldn't agree more.  I could **easily** make you a list, super-fast, of all my super-amazing friends/mentors I have from this place.  And hence, the reason behind why leaving is going to be so. darn. hard.

Thomas & Ruth
Fellow 2012-2013 interns.
Our neighbors.
Our dear friends.
Like family.
The next night (Friday) we had our annual "Intern Wives Celebration" (formally known as the "SWF Tea").  My. absolute. favorite.  Do you know how much I love that night?  Well, I love that night.  Like a whole lot.  A lot.  It's a night I look forward to all year long.  It's right up there with date night.  no joke.  This night is pretty much the best.





All the intern wives of that current year, come on back to the area.  #1 for graduation.  But #2 for that night.  We all sit around, eating desserts and drinking iced-cold lime-slice-filled water, and listen to these girls (my friends) pour their hearts out.  They tell about their internships.  The good.  The bad.  The ugly.  And the tears...oh! the tears we all shed!  Tears of shared JOY.  And tears of shared heart-ache.  Tears of shear FEAR (well, for me anyway...seeing as Mike and I are heading out for our internship soon...***gulp***....help?)  Everyone's faith becomes a little stronger.  A little more sure.  A little more real.  You can actually see God working in your lives.  Right in front of you.  Before your very eyes.  You see the Master's hand painting, with precise and calculated brush-strokes, a masterpiece out of a life.  Theirs.  And yours.  And God is so REAL in that moment.  You have full confidence that if you reached out your hand, you could actually touch Him.  I'm not kidding.  Because the fire in your soul gets stirred.  And the flame burns hotter.  And you are reminded of your purpose.  You feel whole.  You feel loved.  And you want to go.  Run.  And drive hard and fast after God's glory.




That's what makes me love that night so much.  And those ladies.  They understand all that.  We feel it.  Together.  A common bond and passion to please God with our lives.  And not just to be satisfied with today.  But to grow greater.  Better.  For the cause of Christ.  The bond that is created in that room is like nothing I've ever known.  That yielding to God and welding of passion is what makes those 'connections' stand the test of time.
And one more of Ruth.
Why?
Because, honestly...
I love her.
I know God has sent BBS and all the good it has done in my life for a purpose.  And for a season.  But it doesn't make this "leaving" thing any easier.  Like I said....it's gonna be so. darn. hard.

My SWF small group: May 2011
(sadly, not all the ladies are represented in this pic)
{can I get a shout-out to group #3!  woot!  woot!}



79°
Thunderstorms predicted.
Warmth welcomed.
Sundresses anticipated.

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

"the" picture


Each intern must submit a picture of himself and his family to the seminary to be used in the newsletters, for the intern display board, and other various publications.  And this is the one we chose.  It was the picture we had taken on Easter morning.

Taking a picture with two littles can be such a challenge!  This is the best one we could get, despite the fact that little miss refused to look at the camera.  All the other shots had her face turned away as she rested her head on Mike's shoulder {or was crying} while John David continued to make the craziest-looking scowls.  But all in all, I think it turned out great = an up-to-date and {mostly} happy picture of our sweet little family!

70°!!!
It's raining this morning at 9AM.
The forecast predicts sunshine.
Here's hoping that's true.
We want to be able to play outside!

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

defending his faith

Mike was scheduled to walk into a room with 2 of his professors at 10AM today to take his oral exam in which he would spend time defending the doctrinal paper that has taken him over 4 years to collaborate and write.

A doctrinal paper is a paper in which he writes out EVERYTHING he believes about God, the Bible, and it's affect on mankind...including specific references to each Bible verse that would be affiliated with that belief.  It's a lot, folks.  I had the privileged of typing up a portion of that paper to help him out {because that's what we seminary wives do...and believe it or not, a portion of that degree belongs to me considering how many times I've proofread, typed, and helped him figure out answers to some tough question...I'm just sayin'...}...I digress...but having typed a part of it, the topics discussed were so deep, I felt my mind drowning in information.  A doctrinal paper isn't for the faint of heart.  Or an idiot.  He has to put together all the theology he has come to find to be true, according to his study of God's Word.  Meaning, that some of the things he's come to assess as "truth" may or may not be what the seminary deems as "truth".  He has had to think for himself as he rightly divides the Bible and listens to the Holy Spirit.  

Which leads to this morning....
...those professors have read his paper (all 70 plus pages of it) and gone through it with a fine-toothed comb.  They even double-checked all his Scriptural references, to be sure the references aligned with his statements.  His oral exam is those profs asking for clarification of his written theology...aka.  a mild interrogation, of sorts.  To have Mike tell them why he believes what he believes on the deepest of levels.

I get a call this morning at 8:30 that his oral exam is going to place now....not at 10 due to some last-minute schedule changes.  oh. my!  I could tell he was thrown off guard, but also knew that he was probably glad it would be done and over with 2 hours sooner than expected! ha!  

He said, "If I don't make it out alive, always know that I love you and the kids very much.  It was good knowing you."  What a goof.

I get a call a few hours later to hear his wonderful voice tell me he passed.  He PASSED!  He passed with an A!!!!  He also told me the professors were incredibly encouraging and helpful to him.  They gave him lots of advice and confidence in him as a future pastor.  He said it wasn't as bad as he had made it out to be.  He was able to answer their questions to their sanctification and beyond!  They were pleased at his ability to sense the direction of their questions and to understand the need for consistency in his beliefs (so as not to contradict himself).  What a blessing from the Lord!

I am one proud seminary wife.  

And a happy one, to boot!  Now that his orals are done....he is completely done with classes.  NO MORE. All we do now, is spend time together as a family until July 15th.  And if you don't mind, I'm gonna just sit back and soak it all in....


65°
Rainy and wet this morning.
Time with a friend.
Time with my mentor.
Now, it's partly sunny, dry and warming up.
A chocolate cream pie is in the fridge.
Coffee is in the cup.
It's a good day.


Monday, April 30, 2012

75 days to go

Our yard sale on Saturday went amazing!  We earned close to $300 and managed to sell 80% of our things!  We had to rent a small U-Haul truck just to get it all there.  When I said I was selling my entire house, I wasn't kidding! ha! But when the sale was all said and done, I was able to consolidate the rest of my unwanted treasures into boxes so that it all could fit in the trunk of my car!!  {mind you, we own a Chevy Equinox...so we still had quite a few treasures left over...}  I then immediately dropped them off at our local Goodwill store.  I was dead serious about not bringing any of that stuff back into the house!

The highlight of my day {other than my sweet friend Julie stopping by my table just to say "hi!"} was when one particular lady told me her story as she sifted through my baby-girl's baby clothes.  She was going to Haiti this summer with her adult daughter and was pleased to find such beautiful things to bring with her to dress little Haitian girls that would never dream of owning something so nice.

I about burst into happy tears.  

Because having people flippantly sift through those clothes throughout the day, made me more emotional than I anticipated....because, there were my precious memories, of Annaleigh's first 2 years of life, strewn all over as people picked and hemmed and hawed....I can't tell you how many times I was caught off guard by the rush of emotion!!  I wanted to tell them every story of every outfit.  I wanted to remind them to be gentle because Annaleigh had worn a particular pink onesie her first week of life... 

Thankfully, that lady's story made it all worth it.  I can just imaging a sweet little baby in Haiti wearing that pink onesie. 

It even made up for the comment another lady said about these "beautiful clothes" being "absolutely perfect for her rag-doll at home."  ummm....ooookkkkkk?

I still have more purging to do, along with selling some of our larger items on Craigslist.  But all in all, it's mostly done!  Hooray!  My attic is mostly empty!  Hooray!

We are that much closer to Rochester, NY.  75 days to be exact (thanks to my friend Ruth reminding me, via her phone, of such information).  Speaking of Ruth, her husband and my husband rode to the seminary together for the last time this morning (a common occurrence throughout our time here).  **sniff, sniff**  All these "last-this"'s and "last-that"'s are getting harder and harder for me.  I threatened to take a picture of them this morning, for posterity's sake.  I decided against it, feeling silly {but secretly wishing it didn't feel so silly}.  I'm going to miss those Andersons.  Along with a whole bunch of other people.  I need to stop talking about this now.  I'm about to cry.

Anyway, please be thinking of Mike tomorrow morning.  Prayers are appreciated.  He will be taking his oral exam for his doctrinal paper defense.  **gulp**  It's sorta like the storm before the calm.  I don't think either of us will be able to sleep tonight due to nervous churning stomachs.  I'll let you know how he does.  At this point, I think he's merely hoping to walk out of the room alive.  Yeah, we dream big, don't we?




65°
Sunny!
Clear!
Beautiful!
Perfect! 

Friday, April 27, 2012

pre-internship bucket list

I've been keeping a mental bucket list for a little while now. Things that I'd like to do here in NEPA before we set-sail to Rochester, NY.  Some of these things we've already done...I'd just like to be able to do them one more time!  Here they are, in no particular order:
Considering this is a mental list, I have this nagging feeling in my brain that there are more things that should be listed up there.  oh well.  If I think of them, I'll come back and add it.  sound good?  no pressure, right???

Until then I'd like to...
photo credit
Hey.  Don't you judge me!  Instead, join me.  It would be fun.  Of that I'm sure.


50°
Partly sunny.
Windy and cool.
It's sad that we are back to wearing jackets.
  

Thursday, April 26, 2012

yesterday & today & tomorrow

Yesterday...
...she was 3 months old...
...helping her Daddy study for his Hebrew class.

Today...
...she is 2 years old...
...helping her Daddy write one of the last seminary papers he'll ever have to write...
...all the while, proudly piling one of my necklaces on top of his head.




Tomorrow is...
... Mike's last day of seminary class EVER.

...the seminary's awards-chapel.

...my last Pennsylvania WIC appointment.

...the day which we will rent a U-Haul
because we have so much stuff
to bring to the BBC yard-sale on Saturday.


And I can say with confidence:
the LORD was with us yesterday
when we started seminary.
He is with us today 
as we prepare to leave PA for our internship.
And He will be there tomorrow
as we continue to live out our lives fully submitted to Him.


Psalm 115:13, 15 & 18
He will bless those who fear the LORD, 
who made heaven and earth...
May you be blessed by the LORD,
who made heaven and earth!
But we will bless the LORD from this time forth and foevermore.
Praise the LORD!

60°
Partly cloudy.
On the chilly side.
Mercies renewed.
A God who sits on the throne. 

Monday, April 23, 2012

the purging of 4 years and a yard sale

This is Mike's last week of seminary classes.....ever.

You probably have absolutely no idea of the number or height of emotions that sentence creates for me as a seminary wife!

It was four years ago we packed up our Fitchburg, MA apartment into a moving truck, set our clunky, old, non-working washer/dryer onto the front curb (in hopes that either the garbage man or any man would take pity upon that rusty duo and put it out of it's misery, because we surely weren't going to do it!), and drove approximately 5 hours, south, to what would eventually be the start of our seminary life.
Mike and I
4 years ago
Such anticipation and excitement for our future!  But little did I know, that kind of change would also bring me loneliness, depression, and fear.

Now, that I know the range of emotions of which my brain is capable, it's a newly overwhelming feeling to be standing in a such familiar spot.  Gazing out onto my future...and not having a blessed clue as to what I'm looking at, yet knowing it could be oh.so.scary.

***
I know what you're thinking...oh, Michelle...it's going to be OK.  God has plans for your GOOD....I know this truth very well.  But if we all are truly honest with ourselves...it doesn't help anyone IN THE MOMENT nor does it make all that scariness just go away.  I still have to ENDURE this stuff people!  To be even more honest, I don't think it's a bad thing to be scared.  Here's why I think that:
Most people I know are quite fond of the apostle Paul, not because he was a super-achiever who spread the gospel throughout the known world, but because he realized that his pains and limitations were what kept him dependent on Christ.  He knew he was a mess.   
-Mary Beth Chapman, Choosing to SEE 
So...yeah.  I'm scared.  And that's what's OK.  I'm dealing with it.  Because, like Mary Beth said, I'm being kept dependent on Christ.  And He knows that I know I'm a mess.  That's good stuff, right?  I thought so.
***

The official start date of our internship is July 15th.  Exactly....exactly...the same date we left for seminary 4 years ago.  Did you just get chills, too?  


Therefore, this mama has stepped into major high-gear with the purging process.  I had told myself 4 years ago, as I stood in the empty attic of our new apartment, that this attic would stay empty.  Are you laughing?  Because I am.  Our attic is a far cry from being empty.  All it took was a-little-of-this and a-little-of-that, a couple babies later, and now I have to clean it out.  And I hate to clean.  In spite of that truth, I've been going through every nook and cranny of this place, pulling out everything last knick knack and appliance I own, asking myself two questions:
Is it useful to me?
Is it beautiful to me?

If the answer is "no" to each of those questions, I'm getting rid of it.  Not to say that these things are nice and good things.  They are.  It just that when you have multiple nice and good things, it starts to resemble nice junk and good(?) clutter.  And that's the definition of my house most days...junkie and clutter-y.

So off it's going!  To my yard sale!  Hooray for yard sales!  Hooray for purging!  

This Saturday, BBC&S will be having it's annual "Lot" sale (aka.  a yard sale happening right on their campus which anyone can rent a space to sell their "treasures" and for any others to come and buy it all.  please come and buy it all!  my stuff, that is.)

The reason for the purging and the selling is because I hate packing almost more than I hate cleaning.  That's a lot of hate.  I refuse to pack a ton of boxes which will have to be heaved and hoed into a moving truck (I shutter at the thought).  And if I can make a little bit of profit off of the things I don't want to pack, then that's a bonus!  Hooray for yard sales!  Hooray for less boxes!

So that's what I'll be doing for this week: Moving my treasures down from my non-empty attic, so that I can organize it, to sell it all this Saturday to all those treasure-seeking buyers that will fill up their attic and empty out mine.  I'm so happy to be de-cluttering my house so that I have less to pack into a truck on July 15th.  But not less to actually clean!  And I guess I'm still packing it onto a truck...just on a different day...so that I can sell it.  Oh well.  Maybe I should just stop collecting treasures.  And away we go!!....




48°
Rainy.
Cold.
Our family is doing our best to fight off sickness.
This silly back-and-forth weather is to blame.


Wednesday, March 28, 2012

my plans aren't always His plans...

...and that's a good thing!
Today was no exception.
If you asked me what I had "planned" for the day, it wasn't this!
One of the things on my "to-do" list was to continue with  my blogging series.

But at 10:30am, I got a phone call from my husband letting me know he will be coming home for lunch {insert elation!}...with...guests {a family of 6, mind you}!  

{insert frantic-perfectionist-control-freak-panic here}

Needless to say, I figuratively threw my 2012 planner out the kitchen window.

And I geared up and switched my focus into "hostess-mode".

{Side note/story:  Let me just take a minute to say something here.  I have recently been training myself to get into the regular habit of maintaining my household:  beds made every morning, dishes done multiple times per day (and especially before bed), doing a 10 minute "sweep" of my house here and there throughout the day, doing one load of laundry/day, cleaning up toys before nap-time and before bed-time, etc, etc.  I've been doing great at this!  I'm so proud of myself!  {patting myself on the back}  I rarely have had days of intense cleaning...because I do a little bit each day.

All this to say, when Mike called me, the panic wasn't because my house wasn't in order...because my house looked great {I have not always been able to say this}!  The heart of the reason why I've been trying to do better at keeping my house is because of the Lord's recent conviction.

He has been showing me, over time, that this "job" of being a SAHM, has been appointed by Him to me...being a SAHM is a blessing and a great ministry.  One which brings glory to God!  I'm learning this life is not a burden, but a blessing!!!

And when Mike called, that mind-set was confirmed.  Because Mike told me {in more or less words} that he knew he could call with such a request, and not place extra pressure on me, because he knows how hard I've been working to maintain the order of our home.  This showed me that keeping my home orderly, on a regular basis, is work I do for the glory of God. And, although, most days, I never see how my "work" affects eternity, today I did!!

With misty eyes, the couple that came to eat lunch with us, expressed such deep gratitude and expressed God's confirmation on their decision to start seminary in the fall due to the incredible hospitality they have felt while being in PA.  Can you believe that?  Mopping my floors IS A MINISTRY.  What a blessing!  Not only to my family, but to those unexpected guests that happen to drop by!!  To God be the GLORY.

What if my house looked like it usually did?  (a disaster...)  I wouldn't have been as willing to accept these guests into our home.  And a willingness to be hospitable was what the Lord wanted from me today!  I was able to participate in the Lord's will for my life, the life of Mike and the lives of our guests because my house  wasn't gross!  (I said it wasn't 'gross', mind you.  That's because it's not eat-of-the-floor-clean and perfect...you do NOT have to have a perfect home - or clean, for that matter - to be hospitable and used of the Lord...and my house is usually GROSS.  Yes, I know even stating that fact is 'gross'.  But it's the truth.  And that's what you get when you come visit my blog, folks.)  What I'm saying is that I could HAPPILY participate in God's will for my life because I was already actively doing God's will in my life.  I needed that confirmation from Him.  He doesn't have to choose to give that to me, but He does.  And that's true love, folks....}

UPDATE:  The family above talked with Mike when they returned to the seminary.  They went on to discuss how the Lord has strongly convicted them during this trip in the area of hospitality.  They have a new desire to show the same abundant love and friendliness towards others that are in the same circumstances they are currently in:  in the process of up-rooting their family, the transitions involved, and the various trips to the seminary (before they attend) to figure out details (housing, jobs, schools, etc...).  They want to be able to happily open their homes to prospective seminary families because of how hospitable every one has been to them here!  How cool is that???  All the glory goes to the Lord.

Anyway...there is one thing that has remained on my to-do list.  That is to go get ready for our date night!  Can I get a woot!  woot!

So if you'll excuse me, here I go!

See you all tomorrow when I {prayerfully and in God's will} continue my blogging series on true beauty.

Annaleigh helping me feed John David a bottle.
(Sometimes he requires a supplement of formula because he's hungrier than what I can give him!)
That boy loves his food!!

67° and weird weather.
We've had dark clouds, rain, sun, wind, cold, warm, and the threat of a thunder storm.
Like I said...weird.


Wednesday, March 7, 2012

internship q&a: the last 3

HERE, HERE, and HERE are the previous posts, in case you missed them.
::::

What will your internship look like?

Well, for me personally, as the wife, it will look a little different than what it will look like for Mike.  Overall, we will be there for one year.  We may move into a house owned by the church.  If not, we will need to find an apartment near our internship site, that is affordable.  We will then begin learning what we can by being zealously pro-active in the church.  But to sum it up, nothing is actually required for me!  ha!  However, as I said before, the seminary has explained I will only get out of this experience what I put into it.  So they've graciously supplied me with suggestions!  Which is good, seeing as I am one who craves pre-planned direction!

My Ministry Experience (aka Ministry Visits)
Each site handles this in their own way.  However, it is suggested I visit six various ministries and interact with someone about the experience.  It is a "tool" to expose me to ministries.

Applied Bible Analysis
I am asked to evaluate my husband's preaching.  Since Mike is required to speak, at least, four times during our internship, I'm asked to complete the included evaluation form, discuss my observations with him, and then give him the completed forms to turn in with the rest of his APA requirements.

Core Curriculum 
My mentor and I will meet regularly (bi-weekly) to interact and discuss topics such as (but not limited to):

  • The husband and wife as a ministry team
  • Raising children in the ministry
  • The ministry of hospitality
  • Discipling others
  • Personal spiritual development
  • How to deal with confidential information
So, all in all, I will participate in the church and it's happenings.  At the same time, regularly meeting with my mentor to discuss and process all the information and lessons being learned.  


::::

When are you graduating?

 The plan is, if the Lord wills, Mike will graduate in May of 2013 with a Masters of Divinity.

::::

What are your plans after internship?

I can only guess what you all are thinking!  It makes the corners of my mouth turn up a bit.  Because you all have the "answer" in your minds.  But let's do a small biblical reality check:  since we are doing our best to live a life according to God's word, following His plan for our lives, while humbly submitting to whatever may come our way...we know that ANYTHING is possible.  And not just the "impossible" either.  We know that even the possible is possible.  Confused?  Let me explain...

We believe Mike will graduate after his internship.  As far as we know, this is pretty certain.   But just because someone has a degree in a certain field, does not mean they will get a job in that certain field.

But after graduation?
Here's a few scenarios (but not limited to):
  1. Mike is hired onto the staff at Northridge.  We stay in Rochester indefinitely.  We plant a daughter church (sometime in the future).  Mike becomes a lead pastor.
  2. Mike is not hired at Northridge.  Mike is hired on staff at different church somewhere in America.  We plant a daughter church (sometime in the future).  Mike becomes a lead pastor.
  3. Mike is not hired at Northridge.  Mike isn't hired at any church, at all.  We stay in Rochester (or move somewhere in America) where he gets a job doing something that will support our family while we pray for God's wisdom.
  4. Mike and I become missionaries.  (This is not a burden of ours, but experience has taught me that God uses the lives of His people however He wants, for His glory!  So if this is what He wants...we'll hop on the plane to get there!)
So....who knows?!?!  Only God.  And it's in Him I'm learning to trust.  Because, honestly, this goes against every fiber of my natural being.  I enjoy knowing.  Wouldn't it bother you to not have a blesséd idea where you will be living next year and what you'll be doing and how you will be able to pay for food???  This is so hard for me.  

The only way my brain, emotions and soul can find any sort of comfort is to wake up each day, place my feet on the floor, and know God will give me strength for the next 24 hours.  One. day. at. a. time.

I also live with anticipation of the amazing story that is being written of my life.  My friend, Jessica, always reminds me how wonderful it will be to look back and see the hand of God show up in a BIG way even though the next step you take is terribly uncertain and unclear.  It helps me to press forward.

Like I said, I enjoy knowing.  And the only thing I can know, for sure, is that I serve a God that loves and cares for me.  One who will never mistreat me.  And all will work out for the good of His ultimate plan for this world.  And what a privilege to also know that He allows little-ole-me to have a part in it.

Please join us while we pray for:  
  • A place to live in Rochester that is affordable and near our internship site.  (some specifics:  three bedrooms, a type of office-space for Mike to work, a kitchen with counter space, cabinets, and a stove-hood, a yard for Annaleigh and JD to play, one level (if not one level, a bathroom on each floor), and walls that are well-insulated (our current heating/cooling bills are out of this world!).  (I know these specifics may seem crazy to you that I should ask...but I believe in the general rule that you don't have because you don't ask!!  So, we may not get these things...but it doesn't hurt to ask, right?)
  • A mentor with which I "click."  My personality tends to come off a bit....ummm...strong to some.  
  • A sense of peace/security about our unknown future.
  • Our future.  

62° sunny and very windy here in NEPA!  We were able to get outside and enjoy the beautiful day!

Thursday, March 1, 2012

Today...

...is March 1st.

I'm writing this to you from our computer room (apropos...don't you think? and using that fancy new word I just learned...you like?).  The door is currently shut.  This is so my children don't hear me breathing or the sound of the light taps of my finger-tips on this-here keyboard.  They were born with stealth-spy ears.  (Not sure who they inherited that from...)  They hear anything that resembles a human (specifically, their Mommy) and instantly scream for rescuing from their crib cages.

This is the 3rd day of Annaleigh's potty training. I had it all planned out perfectly.  Then my daughter messed it up.  Because, for some reason, a 2YO can't understand the adult plans of her Mommy (which would have had her trained yesterday).  So....I've had to modify the plan.  And I'm happy to say it's more toddler friendly (specifically, Annaleigh friendly...which means MnMs have to be included in the equation on a regular basis...). She's doing much better today.  So there is hope.  Hope for Mommy to not go insane.  Which creates a win/win for all involved.

This is also they day of our March SWF monthly meeting.  I get to go hear Joanna Arp speak on how to be my husband's cheerleader.  The title says it all, "Get Behind Him!  Cheer Him On!!!"...Joanna is so cute.  So animated.  So lively.  So passionate about the things of God.  It's hard not to have it rub off on you.  I really enjoy these meetings.  A chance to get out.  Without my beloved babies.  Eat dessert.  Drink soda.  Spend time catching up with friends.  But most importantly, have my heart gripped by God.  A.maz.ing.  Doesn't it make you want to be a seminary wife?

Today, I also started the herb supplement called Fenugreek.  For all your nursing mamas (past and present)...you just may be familiar with such a concept.  Let's just say JD is always hungry and this little mama of his is having trouble keeping up...we'll leave it at that.

March 1st is also the first day of Ann Vonskamp's March Joy Dare list.  (So apropos that it begins on the 1st...hmmm?  Man, I just LOVE that word, don't you?  I even got to use it TWICE in one post.)  It goes along with her book (and philosophy) One Thousand Gifts.  I read the book in 3 days.  It has literally changed my entire. life.  And so now I can't help but participate in it.  Today's gifts?  3 gifts at 3PM:  a 2YO happily sitting on a potty, a baby boy's smile, the start of some alone time.

And today was the day I realized that it's not selfish of me to crave, desire, and yearn for relationships with others.  It says in Genesis 1:27, "So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created him; male and female he created them."  That not only means the obvious...but it means that because God is a triune figure...they experience relational intimacy with each other.  So if I am created in that image, I would have a God-given desire to want relationships.  To want to be loved.  And accepted.  And gushed all over with affection.  Maybe that's a reason I blog.  Because I crave the friendships I have out here in the blogosphere.  I love my readers.  Some of you I know personally.  Others, only through thoughts which have become realized.  Either way...the yearning is there.  I'm really glad you stopped by to see me.  Thanks for reading.

Today's weather:  38°.  Rainy.  Cloudy.  (surprise, surprise...welcome to NEPA)

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

internship q&a: what will you do once you get there?

If you missed the previous answers to some internship questions, 
click HERE, HERE, or HERE.

Lots.
We will be doing LOTS.
But can I first say, I am terribly grateful for this process.  It's such a wonderful opportunity for Mike and I to put into practice the things we've learned over the past 4 years AND to continue to learn through experience.

On the 13th, the husbands and their wives were invited to an Internship Colloquy Dinner.  (Don't worry, I didn't know what the word "colloquy" was either.  I had to look it up.  It means a discussion, or conversation, about internship.  It cracks me up how fancy the seminary tries to be sometimes...)  And I was enlightened a lot more about our goals and expectations for the internship.  A lot of questions were answered, information shared, and {most} fears calmed.  Now I feel all the more confident in sharing with you what we will actually do during internship.  And the seminary provided a simply chart breaking it all down for me.  How convenient.

These will be Mike's requirements:

Four Supervised Training Projects - Mike will be responsible for developing and facilitating 4 ministry related activities.   He will obtain excellence in ministry development by "doing" ministry.  Skill development.  Strategic ministry efforts.  Planning, setting goals, implementation, and evaluation.

Five Preaching Assignments - (these do not have to be limited to only 5 times, but is given as the minimal requirement) - He will obtain excellence in research.  Delivery.  And learning to "say it right and say it well."

Ordination Doctrinal Paper - This is something he has collectively and progressively been working on since day 1.  He will be expected to give precise, theologically accurate statements and expected to have the ability to respond well during the oral examination given by 2 faculty members of BBS.  He will learn to write what he believes and write it well; and to defend what he believes and say it well.

Field Experience Log - Daily entries which include a weekly review and evaluation.  This also includes weekly internship reports, monthly internship reports, the coach's quarterly progress report, critical incidents, and a final summary review and evaluation.  He will learn to develop the "eyes of a leader" for life and ministry; the "accountability habit"; weekly planning and personal performance review.

Ministry Planning and Goal Setting - He will learn to gain vision.  Appreciate his personal potential.  Develop as a team of ministry professionals.  Gain general insights for ministry.  And understand what is required of a pastor.

All of this will take place under the supervision of his "coach".  Someone who has been appointed (usually the lead pastor, but not necessarily) to be an official mentor to Mike.  Without a coach, all of the above would be just busy work.  There needs to be someone to guide, direct, encourage, advise, reprove, and pray for Mike.  That is what will make the entire internship profitable.

My requirements are not so much "required" as they are strongly encouraged.  Basically, I will get out of the experience what I put into it.  It's up to me on how much I want to be involved.  But do you know me?? If you don't, let me just say:  I do almost NOTHING halfway.  Which can, at times, be a drawback to my personality.  But for the most part, it's what has helped me be successful in my life.

We pardon the interruption for a brief related story:
I was not a good student.  I am currently not a good student.  I rarely got As in school.  Mostly Bs.  Occasional Cs.  And there have been grades rarely lower...but we won't talk about those right now.  My point is this...I WORKED HARD for those B grades.  Like REALLY hard.  I busted my tail day and night. I studied too late.  I read too much.  I did too much homework.  I did all  the extra credit I could find (or create).  I asked questions.  Stayed after class.  And I, unashamedly, did the brown-nosing thing.  I had the will...and therefore there was a way.  I refuse to fail.

So let's just say, I will do all I can to squeeze every last drop of learning out of this internship.  No doubt.  Because I'm just that way.

But some basic goals they've given me are this:

  1. To grow in my personal walk with the Lord.
  2. To grow as a ministry partner.  (I love that.  BBS feels so strongly about this:  Mike and I are a team.  And this internship is just as much mine, as it is his.)
  3. To give Mike a chance to succeed.
  4. To learn to live with dissonance.  Because my view of my role will be different than how any church we are a part of views my role.
  5. Experience ministry stressors.
I received a whole notebook, that night, filled to the brim with suggestions on how to accomplish those goals. I, too, will also receive a ministry coach for the same reasons Mike needs one.  But my coach will specifically help me in the following areas:  learning about the husband/wife ministry team, raising children in the ministry, hospitality, disciplining others as a ministry wife, personal spiritual growth, and how to deal with confidential information.  

They have also provided me with a journal with guided topics to help me process the transition, changes and lessons I will experience.

BBS suggests I get involved in ministries where I see a need for growth, or an area in which I like to learn more.  They would wish that I join my coach in one of the ministries in which she is involved.  They would also like me to join Mike in ministry during one of his four ministry projects to learn what it's like to pray with and work alongside my spouse toward a common goal.

So, as I said, there will be lots for us to do {and more} once we get on site.

Again, I cannot express my appreciation enough for BBS and their desire to come along side me, the intern wife, so that I, too, may be prepared for what lies ahead.  Their conviction is that if the wife is prepared on how to help her spouse in full-time ministry, God's work will have a better chance of success.  I would have to agree.

Please Pray for...

  • our coaches.  That they will be ones who stand strong in the Lord, have years of expertise, have gifts and talents from which we can learn, and that we will have personalities that work well together with ours.
  • the ministry they will have in our lives.
  • Mike's ability to perform and execute his requirements with confidence.  May his work and fruit be directed and blessed by God!
  • my ability to balance working hard to learn along with putting my family first.
  • our transition into the church.  That it be smooth, well-accepted, and filled with JOY!
  • us to not be critical of the church and it's methods, but to admire the differences!



Tuesday, February 7, 2012

i'm not feeling very profound today

I have no new revelations to reveal.
Nor do I feel a sense of direction at the moment.
But I have an urge to write.
To write unedited {mostly}.
To let the words simply flow from my mind to my fingers.
So that's what this-here girl is gonna do.

It's 9:37 PM.
I'm sitting on a bed.  A bed that was suppose to be king-sized.  But I think it's really a queen. 
I'm in a hotel in Chicago.  One that is across the street from a McDonald's that holds the world record for most expensive dollar menu.  One that is mostly occupied by people attending Founder's Week at the Moody Bible Institute, us included.
I hear the traffic on the street fiercly whirring by, outside my window.
My two babies are sleeping across the room.  I can hear their silent breathing and the occasional dreamy sigh.

We began our trip on {superbowl} Sunday right after our ABF (adult bible fellowship).  We had packed up the car on Saturday night (for the most part, excluding tolietries, our umbrella, and my gray boots I forgot to put in the suitcase) and bathed the babies so that we could get up and go.

We drove for 5 plus hours and arrived in Toledo, OH.  We stayed in the missionary house on the property of Emmanuel Baptist Church.  What a blessing it was to take advantage of such wonderful hospitality....for free!

Another blessing was to spend some time having sweet fellowship with our friends (and recent graduates from our seminary), Dave and Krista.  They currently are on staff at Emmanuel and the church will be voting soon to see if they will stay or go.  Please pray that they will be voted to stay!

Dave came over the missionary house Sunday night to watch the superbowl game with us (we were suppose to hang out at their house for the game, but their oldest got a stomach bug...plans changed a little, but that was ok!). 

The next morning, Krista and I had a coffee date at Panera.  What a blessing that was!  (and not just because of the great coffee served in a ceramic mug along with the toasted asiago cheese bagel...although that was a big part of it!) If you don't know Krista, you should!  She is an optimistic breath of fresh air combined with wise counsel and a sweet spirit.  I'm sad we didn't get extra time, but thankful for what was had.  Such great conversation.  My heart was put at ease with realistic expectations, encouraged with reminders of God's sovereignty and was given helpful advice from a former intern wife!  I now look forward to my future with that much more joy!  Praise the Lord!

Afterwards, we soon hit the road (well, first, Mike ate his cinnamon crunch bagel and coffee, Annaleigh her chocolate chip muffie, and JD enjoyed some gold liquid...) and headed to Indiana.  Where we had some more sweet fellowship with another set of friends (and recent graduates as well), Chris and Heather.  And we met at Culver's: home of the butter burger and #2 on the list of best frozen custard (#1 being Andy's)!  So. much. fun. 

It reminds me how much I miss our friends.
How much I'll miss our friends.

A few hours later we arrive at our final destination.
Here.
It's cold.
It's windy.
It's wonderful.

Mike said to me, as we briskly pushed our babies and walked our way to the closest Starbucks, "You want to live in the city..."
"No. I don't."
"Yes, you do."
"Yes, I do."
To casually think about it, I'd say I'd never want to live in the city.
Too noisy.
Too fast.
Too inconvenient (as a young family...strollers don't do well in small spaces and frigid air...)
But as my mind begins to ponder the places I love the most:
Boston
NYC
Philly
Charleston, SC
Chicago
...they are all cities.
Life on the move.
But most importantly...life.
I love feeling as if I'm a part of it.
A part of something big.
Something bright.
Something fun.

Maybe it's an outward expression of what I feel inside.
Excitment and possibility!

I love it here.
And I'm with the people I love the most.
And tomorrow's a new day.

I'll wake up.
It'll be Wednesday.
I'll eat a complimentary free breakfast.
I'll live.
I'll love.
I'll be happy.
And I'll pray that it never ends.

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

internship q&a: when and how long?

If you have missed the previous two q&a posts, Click HERE and HERE.

When will you leave?

Theoretically, we could leave NEPA as early as the beginning of June.  Or, it could even be as late as the end of September.  There are many factors involved.  All which include information we don't have yet. (It's all so stressful, no?)  It depends on the church:  when they need us to start.  It depends on us:  we will need to leave when it's the best timing for our family/housing situation/travel.  So all I can say for sure is Summer 2012.



How long will you be there?

The length of our internship is one year.  (Which was one of the things that enticed us and drew us to Baptist Bible Seminary.  We just LOVE that.)  But basically, we will live in the area of the church until May 2013 (graduation).  HOWEVER, if we start late (like in September) we could potentially stay until September 2013 (depending upon Mike's fulfillment of the requirements and/or the needs of the church).  And if this is a church that hired him (who knows?! ha! it's unlikely. but...) we would 'stay, stay' there until the Lord moves us on.  And if we were to be placed in a New England church, this would make it an IDEAL situation.  But I am reminded that my definition of "ideal" and the Lord's definition of "ideal" has the potential (and likelihood) to be vastly different!  (Again...stressful!)

And yet amidst all the stresses this internship may cause me (and you?  you'll journey along with me in my self-destructive and non-biblical habits, won't you?), I rest CONFIDENT in my Lord and Savior.  He has a plan.  A beautiful, perfect plan.  And I am just itching at the bit to find out!

Please Pray with Us:

  • We are praying will know soon of our internship placement (which will ultimately help us pin-point a departing time-frame...because this-here household manager has a whole house that needs to be packed up!!  Having a dead-line of 'packing-up-completion' would set my mind at ease:  when do I have the yard sale?  when do I pack up the kitchen?  what can/can't we do without for a few months/weeks/days?  How much packing-tape do I need to purchase? etc...)
  • I would like to be done with our internship by graduation.  I'm not yet sure how I feel about having to go back to finish up the internship AFTER he 'graduates'...
  • We pray we are placed in New England.
  • We pray that our interning church would hire Mike onto the pastoral staff.
  • I pray for rest and peace of mind as I am struggling with the concept of soon-to-happen-I-don't-know-for-sure-when-it's-coming-but-it's-coming-type-of-change.


Our happy family of four enjoying a Syracuse University basketball game at the Carrier Dome this past weekend.



Monday, January 23, 2012

internship q&a: why don't you just do your internship at your current church?

If you missed the previous q&a post answering the question:  where are you going?  CLICK HERE.
:::

Answer?
Simple. 
Someone else already is.
{one other intern from our seminary has been already approved to begin there this summer.}
But that's not the real reason.
{although valid.}

We LOVE our church.  We have been so blessed to find such a wonderful church family.  The Lord was very clear in His direction 3 years ago during our search for a place to serve.

When we got to NEPA, our hearts were broken and bruised.  We had just endured such a crazy spiritual battle and it left our heads spinning.  We were depleted spiritually and emotionally.  We were weak from trying to be strong for so long.  Our minds were torn.  We had worked so hard for so long to make the right choices and behave in a proper biblical fashion {when most days we weren't even sure what that meant...}  And we were left marred and vulnerable and hypersensitive to certain issues.

But the Lord knows our innermost being.  And He knew what we needed.  Restoration.  Wisdom.  Teaching.  Healing.  And a safe place to fall.

Now?  We have grown spiritually, by leaps and bounds.  The Lord has used our current church to restore confidence in Him and in the people of God.  It has nurtured us.  And made us "whole" again.  We now view this life with a bit more clarity.   

Our church has become our home away from home.  A place full of mentors and friends.  Wise counsel.  Warm arms to surround you when you feel alone.  To pick you up.  To walk beside.  To help endure.

Like I said, we love our church.

But we desire to grow even more than we have.  Our hearts tell us that it would happen best at a location other than where we are.  We crave to know the ins and outs of church planting, from a realistic perspective.  We desire to see various church procedures.  And we want to learn from new minds and from different perspectives.

Would it be easy to just stay put?
Comfortable?
Yes.  Absolutely.

But would it help get us toward the goal the Lord has so strongly burdened us with?
No.
And so, we will move on.
And as we did 3 years ago, we will trust in a God that knows what we need.























Prayer Requests:
  • to find a church for our internship that will best meet our needs
  • to find a church somewhere in New England
  • to find a church that is growing {and not stagnant}
  • to find a church burdened for church planting
  • to find a church where we will fit in well
  • to find a church for our internship very soon




Friday, January 20, 2012

internship q&a: where are you going?

People keep asking us a ton of questions about our impending internship.  Here are just a few of them: 

"What are your plans after internship?"
Bonus:  The things I will miss about PA.

So, the next few posts will be the A to your Q (answers to your questions).  I will answer the first question in this post. Then I will answer the rest in subsequent posts.  And if you have any others, feel free to let me know.  I'll do my best to shed light onto the areas of your curiosity.

Where are you going?
We don't know.
That's right.
We haven't a single clue....yet.
We potentially could be packing our bags and having no idea of our destination.  (And that's my expectation.  So if we find out sooner...what a special blessing!)

We are allowed to request a placement church.  Which we have done.  This is one of them.  And we are still waiting to hear if it's a possibility.  You see, the seminary does a fantastic job of trying to protect it's interns.  We have already taken personality tests and filled out resumés, to ensure the church aligns with our goals, our strengths, and our weaknesses.  The internship coordinator will be going to visit with the church and it's lead pastor.  The pastor must then be interviewed.  The church must understand the requirements which Michael has to accomplish in order to graduate. (They must clearly understand that he is NOT to "used" amongst their various "ministries" wherever a warm body is currently needed.  a.k.a.  They shouldn't make Mike the janitor because they need one.)   The church has to then be approved by the seminary.  And this is what will happen next (more or less):  The church will have multiple interviews with us, as a couple (on site, phone, as well as skype), the church will have to approve us, and ultimately, we will have to agree to go.  I appreciate such a process to find the right placement God has for us!   

We have a few other churches in mind, as well.  The location being places in New England (the area of our burden).  But we do not realistically see them coming through for us.

We could also end up in Michigan or Ohio, because that's where most of the internship coordinator's contacts are.  Many churches in those states have already been approved for future internship placements.  So...that makes them easy.  But we don't want easy.  (And we don't want to be in those states...they are lovely states, but they do not have the type of people we, one day, would like to minister to.)

There are also other concerns on our hearts about our placement.  Ones of affiliation, style of leadership, and relevancy to our burden.  (But I don't feel that a blog is an appropriate platform to discuss some of those things.)  So I will leave your mind wondering!  {Oh!  I love trying to be mysterious!}

As of right now, we are trusting in the Lord and trusting in our internship coordinator!

Prayer requests:
  • To find a church placement for our internship.  One that...
    • is healthy and growing.
    • has a burden for church-planting/currently (or recently)(or attempting) planting churches.
    • is in the New England area.
    • will have godly mentors for Mike and I.
    • will have a good godly support system of ladies (for my wavering heart).
    • will allow us to strengthen our weaknesses.
    • will allow us to use our spiritual gifts.
    • will create a positive experience and learning environment.
    • will have an affiliation we are comfortable with.
    • would have the type of leadership we desire to emulate in the future.
  • To find a church placement sooner rather than later.
  • The grace and peace of mind to accept whatever comes our way!

Wait for the Lord;
be strong, and let your heart take courage;
wait for the Lord!
Psalm 27:14