prayer prompters

Psalms to pray when:

you can't sleep

Psalm 4

you're feeling guilty

Psalm 51:1-17

life seems to have lost it's luster

Psalm 8

you are afraid

Psalm 18:28-36

doubts overtake you

Psalm 19:7-14

you are ill

Psalm 30:2-3, 10-12

you've suffered a loss

Psalm 73:21-28

a storm is raging

Psalm 29

you feel spiritually dry

Psalm 63:1-8

you need protection

Psalm 91

a friend has wronged you

Psalm 55:12-14, 20-22

you are overburdened, tense

Psalm 23

when you feel despair
Psalm 42:3-11

you are thankful

Psalm 136

Do you ever pray the Scriptures?
If so, what are some passages that have helped you in times of need/joy?
Please share in the comments below!

i am not made of plastic

First off, let me just say, that this is not what I had planned to write about today.  Life has been wonderFULL...very very full of good good things.  I really wanted to write about those things.

But...seeing as God is God...He does what He pleases (which is a good thing, in case you didn't know).

He brought me to Psalm 51:16-17 today.

It says,

For You will not delight in sacrifice, or I would give it; You will not be pleased with a burnt offering. 

The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.

The Message translates it like this,

Going through the motions doesn't please You, a flawless performance is nothing to You.

I learned God-worship when my pride was shattered.  Heart-shattered lives ready for love don't for a moment escape God's notice.

As God would have it, this aligns perfectly with my life these recent days.  You all know I'm going on internship.  With that, there is a lot in my life that is "up in the air".  I have been doing my best to have a proper attitude.  Most of my initial reactions (not responses, by the way, but reactions), have been discouragement, unhappiness, discontentment, fear, and the like.

I enjoy comfort.  I enjoy routine.  There is immeasurable comfort in my routine!  But that is not what pleases God.  He loves a heart in turmoil!  Why do I say that?  Because when I am broken, confused, sad, weak and wavering...I recognize my deep deep need for God.  I have no choice but for my imperfect and finite body/mind to fall into His arms.  And He sees that (I'm thankful that He sees me and cares!), wants that, and desperately wants to be my "One and Only"!

He is so gently, graciously, and lovingly showing me that He does not find pleasure in my flawless "performances".  He values honesty and transparency, with myself and Him.  He values that fact that we mess it all up and then turn to Him for the solution (sometimes that solution can be a long-time coming)! True God-worship is when you recognize He is GOD and recognize your need for Him alone (He loves that!  He soaks that up!  A broken life turned to Him is a sweet smelling savor!).  When my heart is shattered, it is primed and ready to accept His love and will.

He could care (more or)less about my "sacrifices" of church-going, congregation-serving, bible-reading, prayers-never-ceasing, verse-remembering, teeth-smiling, NEPA-knowing, feeling-oh-so-happy-life.

What He DOES care about is my sensitivity towards His voice, my desire to know His word, my love for His people, my broken and depressed-spirit seeking His face each moment, learning (learning is a PROCESS!) to find contentment in a less-than-adequate situation, recognizing His hand of blessing, and the never-ending struggle with my sin.  Basically, He delights in my messy, tear-stained, and up-side-down life being laid, willingly, at His feet with no other hope or option but HIM!

God never confuses my transparency with complaining!  NEVER!

I am not plastic.

I am a real mess.  And that is what pleases Him.

my plans aren't always His plans...

...and that's a good thing!
Today was no exception.

If you asked me what I had "planned" for the day, it wasn't this!

One of the things on my "to-do" list was to continue with  my blogging series.

But at 10:30am, I got a phone call from my husband letting me know he will be coming home for lunch {insert elation!}...with...guests {a family of 6, mind you}!  

{insert frantic-perfectionist-control-freak-panic here}

Needless to say, I figuratively threw my 2012 planner out the kitchen window.

And I geared up and switched my focus into "hostess-mode".

{Side note/story:  Let me just take a minute to say something here.  I have recently been training myself to get into the regular habit of maintaining my household:  beds made every morning, dishes done multiple times per day (and especially before bed), doing a 10 minute "sweep" of my house here and there throughout the day, doing one load of laundry/day, cleaning up toys before nap-time and before bed-time, etc, etc.  I've been doing great at this!  I'm so proud of myself!  {patting myself on the back}  I rarely have had days of intense cleaning...because I do a little bit each day.

All this to say, when Mike called me, the panic wasn't because my house wasn't in order...because my house looked great {I have not always been able to say this}!  The heart of the reason why I've been trying to do better at keeping my house is because of the Lord's recent conviction.

He has been showing me, over time, that this "job" of being a SAHM, has been appointed by Him to me...being a SAHM is a blessing and a great ministry.  One which brings glory to God!  I'm learning this life is not a burden, but a blessing!!!

And when Mike called, that mind-set was confirmed.  Because Mike told me {in more or less words} that he knew he could call with such a request, and not place extra pressure on me, because he knows how hard I've been working to maintain the order of our home.  This showed me that keeping my home orderly, on a regular basis, is work I do for the glory of God. And, although, most days, I never see how my "work" affects eternity, today I did!!

With misty eyes, the couple that came to eat lunch with us, expressed such deep gratitude and expressed God's confirmation on their decision to start seminary in the fall due to the incredible hospitality they have felt while being in PA.  Can you believe that?  Mopping my floors IS A MINISTRY.  What a blessing!  Not only to my family, but to those unexpected guests that happen to drop by!!  To God be the GLORY.

What if my house looked like it usually did?  (a disaster...)  I wouldn't have been as willing to accept these guests into our home.  And a willingness to be hospitable was what the Lord wanted from me today!  I was able to participate in the Lord's will for my life, the life of Mike and the lives of our guests because my house  wasn't gross!  (I said it wasn't 'gross', mind you.  That's because it's not eat-of-the-floor-clean and perfect...you do NOT have to have a perfect home - or clean, for that matter - to be hospitable and used of the Lord...and my house is usually GROSS.  Yes, I know even stating that fact is 'gross'.  But it's the truth.  And that's what you get when you come visit my blog, folks.)  What I'm saying is that I could HAPPILY participate in God's will for my life because I was already actively doing God's will in my life.  I needed that confirmation from Him.  He doesn't have to choose to give that to me, but He does.  And that's true love, folks....}

UPDATE:  The family above talked with Mike when they returned to the seminary.  They went on to discuss how the Lord has strongly convicted them during this trip in the area of hospitality.  They have a new desire to show the same abundant love and friendliness towards others that are in the same circumstances they are currently in:  in the process of up-rooting their family, the transitions involved, and the various trips to the seminary (before they attend) to figure out details (housing, jobs, schools, etc...).  They want to be able to happily open their homes to prospective seminary families because of how hospitable every one has been to them here!  How cool is that???  All the glory goes to the Lord.

Anyway...there is one thing that has remained on my to-do list.  That is to go get ready for our date night!  Can I get a woot!  woot!

So if you'll excuse me, here I go!

See you all tomorrow when I {prayerfully and in God's will} continue my blogging series on true beauty.

Annaleigh helping me feed John David a bottle.
(Sometimes he requires a supplement of formula because he's hungrier than what I can give him!)
That boy loves his food!!

67° and weird weather.
We've had dark clouds, rain, sun, wind, cold, warm, and the threat of a thunder storm.
Like I said...weird.

a girl of surpassing beauty: part 4 {how to cultivate proper self-talk}

Click HERE for PART 1

HERE for PART 2

HERE for PART 3

We need to start loving and seeing ourselves the way God loves and sees us.

= the brunt of this series.

In the first 3 parts of this series {here, here and here}, I have been explaining that we need to saturate our minds with the things of God.  When that happens, your world view begins to conform to the views of God RATHER than the views of the world.  You begin to understand that TRUE BEAUTY is a heart hungry for Him.  A life lived to glorify God. 

I know what you're thinking...that's great, Michelle.  I agree with you.  But I still feel ugly!  You don't know what I see beneath these clothes!  

Can I tell you something?  When you start to filter your thinking through God's Word...the "world's" idea of beauty will slowly begin to fade away. {note:  I said slowly.  this process doesn't happen overnight, girls!}  And as a result, you will GLOW with TRUE JOY for God and this life.  A joy that can ONLY come from God.  That glow will radiate to others.  And people will be drawn to your God-given beauty.  TRUST ME.  You will feel beautiful.

Because it's not about looks. To prove this, think about it:  isn't it true that you can tell when someone has had a very bad day before they even open their mouth?  How about someone who has lived a long and hard life? Doesn't it just show ALL over them??  Even if they are considered "attractive" by the world's standards?  It's even common to hear the phrase "ugly" used to point out a person's nasty attitude, That girl was acting so ugly... That's because the INSIDE affects our OUTSIDE.  The most beautiful people are the ones who are CONFIDENT and CONTENT.

But as I mentioned in the last post, this process can be so hard:

When an infection is found inside a wound, it must first be removed before the healing process can begin.  As we actively renew our minds, we must also learn how to beat down and fight back all the years of pain, hurtful comments, and false truths that have been told to us.

Mike is a strong advocate for the "replacement theory" {<-----that's not an official name, just a name we affectionately call it in our family...in fact, if you were to google that...it would NOT mean what I'm about to say it means!}  He has taught me how important {vital!} that "theory" is in the process of true change.  Here's what I mean:  whenever a bad habit/behavior leaves, a good habit/behavior must take its place.  Otherwise, the bad habit will never truly leave.  In fact, it will mostly likely return.

All that to say, we must re-learn how to talk to ourselves!  We must exchange wrong thinking with right thinking!!  Here's some tips/suggestions that were inspired by the book, Get Positively Beautiful by Carmindy, on how to cultivate proper self-talk and repair your damaged self-image {this list is not exhaustive}:

1) Stop tearing yourself down!

Stop being mean to yourself.  Just because Suzie in your 4th grade class embarrassingly pointed out to the entire school that your left thumb is slightly larger than your right...doesn't give you license to join her in the mocking.  Ignore 4th grade Suzie. Don't give her the control over your self-worth.  Steal it back and start being KIND to yourself.  You are going to be with yourself for all eternity...so start getting along!  Start reminding yourself that you are a child of God!  God loved you enough to send His only Son to die for your sins (including self-hate)!!  Sit and ponder and try to wrap your mind around that concept!  He loves you JUST THE WAY YOU ARE.  Start loving yourself in the same way.

2) Drop the flaw focus!

"Don't take over the role of critic and turn up the volume."  Start celebrating your individuality and focus on enhancing/praising your unique qualities!  Speak sweetly to yourself in the mirror each morning.  Rather than saying, ugh.  another blemish!, start saying, my green eyes sparkle today!  Rather than saying, no one likes me!, start saying, God has blessed me with ___________ allowing me to bless others!

3) Kick away corrosive comparisons!

a) This is a DANGEROUS game, my friends.  This is what affects me the most.  How about you? Can I assume that you feel the same way?  I start comparing myself to other girls in church, in magazines, on T.V., at the grocery store, on their blogs(!), and almost any other place a female might co-exist with me.    

b) Stop comparing to stop despairing!! 

c) WE are society, girls.  The media will change if we change!  A Proverbs 31 woman is NOT APPRECIATED in our culture.  But the lady who lives those principles out, THAT is beautiful in God's eyes.  We can be the pioneers to set such a standard. 

d) Revel in YOUR fantastic features/qualities.  Because there is no set standard of feminine beauty.  There really isn't!  Every. single. woman is born blessed with SOMETHING she can claim as beautiful.  Tuning in to what is special about you, turns on that inner light that transforms into a thing of beauty.   

e) "Recognize that there will always be someone more this and someone less that.  BUT the one with the most confidence wins every time - so stop keeping score!  "The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we are comparing our behind-the-scenes with everyone else's highlight reel." {source Pintrest}

f)  And finally, do you even know how much it costs Jennifer Aniston to be Jennifer Aniston?  If you don't, let me tell you:  approximately $11,933.90/month.  (say what?!?!)  You heard me read it right.  That means it costs that girl about $141,0377.97 per year to be that "beautiful".  "So the next time you're sighing over a photo of Aniston's face/legs/butt/whatever, consider that with the money she spends to look beautiful for a year, you could: purchase a home in the Midwest, send a kid to college for (almost) four years, buy six Honda Accords, or fly roundtrip from Los Angeles to New York -- in first class -- 44 times! Kinda puts things in perspective, right?" {source via} 

{source via}

You need to stop believing the lies and start listening to the truth.  Pray and ask God to help you to do this.  Because God doesn't make junk.  That means YOU aren't junk.  And God saw everything He had made, and behold, it was very good.  Genesis 1:31

Come back tomorrow for part 5 where I discuss {how to find the beauty inside}.  It's already there!  I promise!

64°

Sunny and breezy.

But it feels like 25° in the dead of winter!

Had a lunch date with an amazing friend today.

Rejoicing with her over good news about her internship!

Writing with love to an audience of One,

Michelle

a girl of surpassing beauty: part 3 {how to renew your mind}

What does THIS and THIS have to do with perception?

When we cultivate proper [biblical] thoughts/mindset, it leads to a proper [biblical] perception, and ultimately, proper [biblical] actions.

The following flowchart is a help to those who have brains that are more visually stimulated {like mine}:

I am super duper practical.
I hate to be told what to do and then not told HOW to do it.
Although the above flowchart is true, what in the world does that look like in my everyday {crazy-of-a} life?

What we all need to practice doing is cultivating biblical thoughts BEFORE we think them.
Because what is already inside you is what will naturally flow out! 

huh.  wait.  what?

Did I lose you?

Come on back.  Saddle up and hear me out.

God created us.  He knows us.  And He wants us to succeed!  So He, conveniently(!), speaks about this in His word.  Whodathunkit?

Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind...Romans 12:2

...and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds...Ephesians 4:23

This "renewing of your mind" {aka. cultivating proper thoughts} will not passively happen to you.  You must work at it.  Like a gardener and his garden.  One must PLANT seeds in their mind prior to harvesting good fruit.

1. Read/study God's Word.  Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who has no need to be ashamed, rightly handling the word of truth.  2 Timothy 2:15
2. Memorize God's Word.  Let the insolent be put to shame, because they have wronged me with falsehood; as for me, I will meditate on your precepts.  Psalm 119:78
3. Surround yourself with godly women.  Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise...Proverbs 12:30
4. Pray.  Pray.  Pray.  Talk with the Lord about your spiritual needs.  Tell Him about your weak areas.  Seek wisdom toward growth.  Thank the Lord and be reminded of all you already possess.  Continue steadfastly in prayer, being watchful in it with thanksgiving.  Colossians 4:2
5. Positive self-talk.  I praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.  Psalm 139:14

Here's a more complete flowchart:

Let me remind you of my goal for this beauty blog series:

To learn how to love ourselves the way God loves us.

To see ourselves how God sees us.

If we are taking the time and effort to cultivate our thoughts according to how God thinks...we will, one day, love ourselves again!

But this can be harder than it appears.  When an infection is found inside a wound, it must first be removed before the healing process can begin.  As we actively renew our minds, we must also learn how to beat down and fight back all the years of pain, hurtful comments, and false truths that have been told to us.  And tomorrow, I will do my best expound upon just that.

:::

I tend to be long-winded {for the sake of being thorough}.  So that is the reasoning behind breaking this topic up into "parts".  I have much more to share with you all!  But, as not to keep you in the dark, and enlighten you on the direction/content of future parts, here's a tentative schedule:

Tuesday, 3/27:  part 4 - How to cultivate proper self-talk

Wednesday, 3/28:  part 5 -How to find the beauty inside
Thursday, 3/29:  part 6 - It's not all about you

I do hope that you will come back and learn more of what God is showing me!  

:::

48°

Sunny.  

VERY windy.  

And much too cold outside.  

Where did summer go?  

Oh.  wait.  

It's still spring.

Happy Monday!

p.s. Tonight, I'm heading to my 2nd week of Bible study on the book of Jonah!  Can't wait!

Writing with love to an audience of One,

Michelle

a girl of surpassing beauty: part 2 {a matter of the heart}

CLICK HERE FOR

PART 1

"Perception is reality."

If you know me, you will hear me saying this a lot.

But is it true?

Is your perception true reality?

No.

Perception is your reality.  That's what it really means.  It's not necessarily an understanding of absolute truth.

And from this is born the self-image.

There are about 830 verses in the bible that contain the word "heart".  Now, I'm not a biblical scholar.  And I'm not God.  So I don't know the real reason for this.  But I'm going to put myself out there and assume it's because the "heart" is severely unstable as a result of our fallen nature (aka. sin).  And for this reason, we need much guidance on how to tame that sucker to bend/conform it to the will of God.  

It says in Proverbs 4:23,

Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.

A better name for "heart" {in relation to this post, not necessarily in general} would be your MIND.  Your thought-life.  It's very true that the things that are important to you live inside your heart, inside your inner-most being, inside that place where your creed is birthed from your soul.  But the next destination for such understandings, is your mind and your thoughts.  The hub of all decision-making.  So whatever your heart is saturated with, will in turn, directly affect your thoughts.  And your thoughts determine your behavior.  Are you starting to get where I'm going with this?

God explains to us in Jeremiah 17:9 that,

The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?

This is why David pleaded in Psalm 51:10,

Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.

Because only God....{let me say that again}....only God can give you a clean heart.  If you don't have any idea what that means and cannot confidently say that you belong to God and are curious CLICK HERE.   However, if you have made such an important and life changing decision, and you are a child of God, then PRAISE THE LORD.  Rejoice!  Rejoice in the fact that you were bought with the precious blood of Jesus!  Rejoice that you can live by the power of His glorious resurrection while serving a living God in this present age through His strength!  Rejoice that you have hope of heaven and of His glorious return as a result of His ascension.  Rejoice!  You HAVE a clean heart.  God is not surprised by your sin because He already died for ALL of it.  Rejoice!  Unfortunately though, despite our perfect POSITION through Christ, our PERSON is still a fallen creature.  We will still struggle with sin.

Ephesians 4:17, 20-24 says [emphasis mine],

Now this I say and testify in the Lord, that you must no longer walk as the Gentiles {aka. those who do not know Christ} do, in the futility of their minds...But that is not the way you learned in Christ! - assuming that you have heard about him and were taught in Him, as the truth is in Jesus, to put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life {before salvation} and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self {after salvation}, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness.

If sin were not a struggle, then why would Paul, who is speaking to Christians, suggest we would have to make an actual effort to PUT OFF the old self and then to PUT ON the new self?  Because it IS a struggle! A struggle we can have victory over with the help and strength of Christ.  Jesus, Himself, tells us in Matthew 11:28-30,

Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.

God will carry us.  He will walk beside us.  In a sense {and I know all illustrations will eventually break down...but...}, He carries our groceries into the house for us.  And He even helps us organize it and put it all away.  He then gives us the menu plan for the week, recipes, and proceeds to teach us how to cook them all!  {IF we let Him.}  He gives us all and teaches us all we need to be successful in this present Christian life!  What great news!  What relief!  He not only saves us from the punishment of hell {which would have been enough}, but He also instructs us and helps us to LIVE OUR LIVES with Christian success!  What an amazing truth!  Rejoice in Him with me and praise Him!

Ok.  So.  Now that we know all this.  What does this have to do with our perception?

Everything.

And tomorrow, I will talk more about that.
But for now, I leave you with this...
If you are a daughter of the King, you are a girl of surpassing beauty...no matter what the story books say!


80° Sunny with some clouds.
Dentist appointment this morning.
And high hopes of some outside play-time to enjoy the warm weather!
The chores will have to wait!


Writing with love to an audience of One,
Michelle

a girl of surpassing beauty {my life-long struggle with self-esteem}: part 1

Can I share a secret with you?

I don't think I'm pretty.

Honestly.  I don't.

Now, it's not that I see myself as "ugly"...but I definitely don't see myself fitting into the "attractive" category.  This is something I have felt for nearly all of my life.

Why is that?  Why is my self-esteem so tarnished and warped?  Why is it self-degrading?  Why do I internally shy away when I see another girl of surpassing beauty?  A feeling that makes me want to find the nearest dark corner and hide?  A desire to:  wish I didn't exist.

I wondered the same thing the other day.  So I began to stroll down the lanes of my memory.  Checking inside each door to find what was inside.  What had I missed?  What details, that were apparently important enough, to shape my entire identity?  Extrinsic and foreign details that have become so ingrained into my emotional skin, that they have become intrinsically grafted onto my heart, into my self-talk, and ultimately, to affect my self-image.

After a few days of quiet pondering, I found it.

And surprisingly to me, it's a story that I've told countless times before.  It's not a story forgotten.  Or hidden.  Or even obscure.  It's a portion of my life that is extremely vivid in my mind.

But I'm just realizing that it was filled with details, so subtle, my mental radar ignored them.

Subtle, but oh-so-important.  Oh-so-large.  Oh-so-damaging.

Here's some back story:
I was born an only child.  My mother and father were divorced when I was only five years old.  It changed me, sure.  Made me who I am today.  And it was hard.  But, looking back, I had an AMAZING childhood.  I loved it.  And despite the emotional hurricane that lived deep inside my soul...my self-esteem remained intact.  In fact, it flourished. I was lucky to have two amazing parents.  They couldn't be married.  BUT they loved me.  And they made sure I knew it.  They never fought in my presence.  They never talked bad to me about the other.  They got along for my sake.  And that bred a sense of security I needed.... albeit, imperfect security....it was more than I could have ever hoped for, given the situation.

Needless to say, my self-image rocked.  It was solid.  I loved me.  I loved life.  I loved my sneakers and my wild&wispy hair (that won't hold a curl to save its life) that could barely be tamed by my daily-wearing of a pony-tail braid.  I loved the two freckles on the side of my neck that sit so close to each other, I would joke how I was once bitten by a vampire.  I also loved how the freckles on my nose only show up when kissed by the summer sun.  I loved dancing around the neighborhood in the summer rains in my bathing suit.  I loved the scars on my knees I got from continual wipe-outs on my bike.  I loved how each of my pinky-toes resemble an elbow macaroni.  I loved the color of my eyes and how they turn into half-moons when I smile. I loved my laugh.  And to wear pop-bead jewelry.  I loved my teddy-bear and blankie (my must-have-accessories for bed-time).  I loved playing tag and hop-scotch and hand games.  I loved jump-roping with my friends.  But most of all, I loved the pink sweater with heart-shaped buttons my Mama had knitted me.

That sweater was awesome.  It was warm.  Cozy.  And PINK.  It was the type of sweater you wore on sick days because it makes you feel better.  It was the type of sweater you wore on sad days because you felt it hug you.  It was the type of sweater you wore on happy days because you looked so. darn. awesome. in it.  It was that type of sweater.

At age 11, my Mama was re-married to another great man (the first, being my Daddy, of course).  And my life was uprooted.  New town.  New home.  New family (I instantly went from only-child, to the youngest of four).  And....a new school.

And here's the story that changed my life, ladies and gents....
I walked into my first day of 6th grade.
I was wearing that sweater.
And they made fun of me for it.

*proceed to swallow hard tears, here*

ouch.

I'm pretty sure, after that day, I questioned EVERYTHING about myself.  And started to see that not everyone loved me.  Not everyone thought I was as wonderful as I saw myself.  This lead to me thinking, well, if a majority of people believe that about me, it MUST be true, right?


That was my down-fall, people.  The dreaded peer-pressure-pre-hormonal-mean-girl-pitfall into self-image destruction.  To. this. day. I pick myself apart.  Trying to "live up" to the invisible and non-existent standards of American society.  Trying desperately to fit-in and be accepted.

BUT
here's what else I've been pondering (besides the origin of my tainted self-image):
How do I fix it??
How in the world do I get back to that place in my life; the time period before I walked into my that 6th grade class?
How do I love myself again?

I found this book at a discount store last summer for $2.99:

The target audience is junior high and high school girls.  But the truths found within are timeless.

I also own (and read a LONG time ago) this book:

In a few following and subsequent posts {I guess you could call it a "blog-series"...but that sounds intimidating to me! ha!} I have decided to share with you the meditations of my heart that have flowed from the combination of these books.  God is showing me great and amazing truths about Himself.  Things such as (but not limited to):

• "...our hearts on the inside determines how we look on the outside."
• when we understand what God sees as beautiful, it affects our thought-life, which then affects how we view our world, including our own worth/self-image
• we should not live according the standards of our society, but to the standards of God's Word
• playing the "compare-game" is extremely dangerous and damaging
• God loved me enough to send His Son to die for my sins...I have redemption through His blood...I potentially can commit blasphemy by not loving myself just as much!  {what am I saying to others about the God I serve, when I hate what He's created and died for?!}

I really hope you come back for visit here in the next few days.  I've learned much {and I'm still learning}.  Maybe you can relate?  Or maybe you have some advice?  Words of wisdom?  Maybe this wound is still all too raw?  Whatever the case, I welcome you!  

I'll leave you with this:

If you are a daughter of the King, you are a girl of surpassing beauty...no matter what the story books say!


79° Partly Sunny Partly Cloudy.  But GORGEOUS out, nonetheless!

Today...

...is March 1st.

I'm writing this to you from our computer room (apropos...don't you think? and using that fancy new word I just learned...you like?).  The door is currently shut.  This is so my children don't hear me breathing or the sound of the light taps of my finger-tips on this-here keyboard.  They were born with stealth-spy ears.  (Not sure who they inherited that from...)  They hear anything that resembles a human (specifically, their Mommy) and instantly scream for rescuing from their crib cages.

This is the 3rd day of Annaleigh's potty training. I had it all planned out perfectly.  Then my daughter messed it up.  Because, for some reason, a 2YO can't understand the adult plans of her Mommy (which would have had her trained yesterday).  So....I've had to modify the plan.  And I'm happy to say it's more toddler friendly (specifically, Annaleigh friendly...which means MnMs have to be included in the equation on a regular basis...). She's doing much better today.  So there is hope.  Hope for Mommy to not go insane.  Which creates a win/win for all involved.

This is also they day of our March SWF monthly meeting.  I get to go hear Joanna Arp speak on how to be my husband's cheerleader.  The title says it all, "Get Behind Him!  Cheer Him On!!!"...Joanna is so cute.  So animated.  So lively.  So passionate about the things of God.  It's hard not to have it rub off on you.  I really enjoy these meetings.  A chance to get out.  Without my beloved babies.  Eat dessert.  Drink soda.  Spend time catching up with friends.  But most importantly, have my heart gripped by God.  A.maz.ing.  Doesn't it make you want to be a seminary wife?

Today, I also started the herb supplement called Fenugreek.  For all your nursing mamas (past and present)...you just may be familiar with such a concept.  Let's just say JD is always hungry and this little mama of his is having trouble keeping up...we'll leave it at that.

March 1st is also the first day of Ann Vonskamp's March Joy Dare list.  (So apropos that it begins on the 1st...hmmm?  Man, I just LOVE that word, don't you?  I even got to use it TWICE in one post.)  It goes along with her book (and philosophy) One Thousand Gifts.  I read the book in 3 days.  It has literally changed my entire. life.  And so now I can't help but participate in it.  Today's gifts?  3 gifts at 3PM:  a 2YO happily sitting on a potty, a baby boy's smile, the start of some alone time.

And today was the day I realized that it's not selfish of me to crave, desire, and yearn for relationships with others.  It says in Genesis 1:27, "So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created him; male and female he created them."  That not only means the obvious...but it means that because God is a triune figure...they experience relational intimacy with each other.  So if I am created in that image, I would have a God-given desire to want relationships.  To want to be loved.  And accepted.  And gushed all over with affection.  Maybe that's a reason I blog.  Because I crave the friendships I have out here in the blogosphere.  I love my readers.  Some of you I know personally.  Others, only through thoughts which have become realized.  Either way...the yearning is there.  I'm really glad you stopped by to see me.  Thanks for reading.

Today's weather:  38°.  Rainy.  Cloudy.  (surprise, surprise...welcome to NEPA)

don't rob me of my blessing!

Romans 1:12...that is, that we may be mutually encouraged by each other's faith, both yours and mine.

With groceries pile high, full to the brim of all things good, she stared me straight in the eye, with finger pointing as she reprimanded, "Don't rob me of my blessing."

For me, that was the beginning of a long lesson that I continue to learn and refine, to this very day.

This soccer mom's high school daughter was on my husband's team.  And after hearing us pour out our hearts in celebration over the blessing the Lord had just given us concerning a large amount of grocery store gift certificates being mailed to our house, she felt compelled of God to pay for all the items in our grocery cart.

As difficult as it was for this "self-sufficient" girl to accept, I released control and allowed myself to receive.

Some of us believe that it's godly to give, but we balk at asking.  It feels uncomfortable being on the receiving end...[but] we have to understand how to give and take [as] a part of growing spiritually.  We actually give others joy and strengthen their faith when we ask for and then gratefully accept their help.  -Joan C. Webb

It's humbling, no doubt, to accept help.  Yet it's one of God's methods of sanctification.  It's His way of reminding us that He's in control and how He desperately wants to take care of us....if we let Him.  ..."How often would I have gathered your children together as a hen gathers her brood under her wings, and you were not willing!"  {Matthew 23:37b}

God has fashioned the body of believers to help each other.  Because, contrary to popular belief, sometimes he does give us more than we can handle.  If He didn't, then what's the purpose of Galatians 6:2 - "Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ"?  Isn't it safe to assume that sometimes life becomes so consuming and overwhelming and "too much" to take, that dependency upon another's faith is actually needed?

And once you relent; once you accept, there is a duplicity of encouragement.  Faith is grown.  And God is glorified.

Joan C. Webb suggests to make it personal:  What family, work or personal concern are you facing this week?  Ask at least one caring friend to support you in prayer for
this specific issue.

I'm linked up here:

Jesus doesn't kick you when you're down

...a bruised reed He will not break...  Isaiah 42:3

 God doesn't mistreat His children.  He cares.  He sent His Son to prove just how much.  

Lord, how comforting to know that You won't crush me when I'm weak and needy.

my fluctuating "best"

This morning I said to Mike,

"Have you ever woken up feeling defeated before you even start?"

My long list of chores and to-do's is overwhelming today!

Last week I was unprepared to take a week "off" so that I may recover from a root canal procedure that became infected.  This has left the organization and cleanliness of my house with MUCH to be desired.

The laundry piles are high.

The Christmas decorations mock me.

And then my devotions bring me here ---->  Philippians 4:12...

I know how to be brought low, 

and I know how to abound.

In any and every circumstance, 

I have learned the secret of 

facing plenty,

and hunger,

abundance

and need.

God is so good.

So loving.

So interested in my life.

Joan C Webb says,

Like Paul, sometimes our best results in poverty, other times in prosperity.  Learning to be content with both our best performances and our could-have-been-better times will lessen our anxiety and help us live more peaceful and accepting lives.

I confessed to Mike that I don't know why I feel I have to "do it ALL" all of the time.  Why must excellence be my only option??  It can be exhausting!

I need to learn to be content with my fluctuating "best."  Because working hard does NOT always result in  SUPERB results.  Sometimes, mediocre is all we have to offer.  And that's OK.  

STOP being hard on yourself and your circumstances and START allowing God's grace to wash over you.  What is it that HE wants you to accomplish today?

Linked up today with...

where is the place of understanding?

I read Job 28:20, 23, 28.

I realized that sometimes life can get confusing.  Deciding which "paths" in life to take.  What is God doing?  Why? Which way is even up, at times??  But when we are in the "dark", frantically searching for wisdom can most of the time be futile.  All that is really required is to WAIT.  "All insight originates with God"  -Joan C. Webb.  It's probably more productive to just step back, relax, calmly ask for wisdom and then wait until God sheds His light on your life.   After that?  Move forward with joy-filled confidence.

It's so liberating to not have to "know" because God already does.  Trust in His perfect sovereignty.  And maybe that's what wisdom truly is....simply to TRUST in God.

why should i love my children? and how?

"Older women...teaching...the younger women...to love their children."

Titus 2:3-5

Younger women need to be taught to love their children because it's not something that comes naturally to a mother.  If it did, the Scriptures would not mention that the younger women need to be taught.  God understands this and is the reason for such a command.

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To read the rest, click HERE, to be directed to the post I wrote today, for the SWF website. 


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Linked up with Darlene today.

Christmas peace? is it even possible?

Today I read 

John 16:33:  I have said these things to you, that in Me you may have peace.  In the world you will have tribulation.  But take heart; I have overcome the world.

Having "peace" doesn't mean the world around me is under control.  {Especially during the holidays.}  

This is a foreign concept to me.  

But the Lord is graciously showing me that IN HIM is where I find my peace despite my hectic circumstances.  Peace IS attainable!  Praise the Lord!  But how?

All I have to do is recognize that the LORD is the one in control.  He reminds me in this verse that, He is so much in control, He has even "overcome the world."  The entire WORLD!! {past, present and future}!  My victory, my hope, my {Christmas} peace is in CHRIST.  I pray He helps me to surrender to that truth today.

the jesse tree: an advent calendar {with free printables!}

There shall come forth a shoot from the stump of Jesse, 

and a branch from his roots shall bear fruit.

Isiah 11:1

This idea is not original to me.  One Christmas, we celebrated at my sis-in-law's house.  She had one of these "Jesse trees" and did this each morning with her two boys that year {she may still even do this}.  She took time to explain to us this "tree" she had sitting on a table in her dining room.  It was an advent calendar, of sorts.  One with a "Christian" perspective.  I was smitten with the whole idea of it.  And even, at that time, before I had my two babies, I knew I wanted to make this a family tradition in our home.

It's a bit time consuming to start it up {preparing each ornament and the coordinating verses}, but I was determined this year to make it a priority.  {Seeing as Annaleigh can currently quote lines from the movie "Elf."}  I take Deuteronomy 6:4-7 seriously.  I want my children to know God and have an understanding available to them so that, someday, they will, God willing, make the choice to choose Christ as their Savior.  How else does this happen without intention?  Even my life, as it's lived before their eyes, must be intentional.  It must be intentionally infused with a biblical mindset and attitude.  So that all I say and do glorifies the Lord.  Enter: the Jesse Tree.

Ok, Michelle. Enough talking...what is a Jesse tree anyway??

I'm glad you asked.

I will tell you.

The Jesse tree represents the family lineage of Jesus {Isaiah 11:1}.  There are 25 ornaments that will eventually adorn the tree.  Each ornament represents the ancestors of Jesus or events leading up to the birth of Jesus.  A biblical reference is located on the back of each ornament, which offers an explanation of the image found on the front of each ornament.

Our family has wrapped the ornaments in tissue paper.  Every morning in December, we will unwrap an ornament and read the correlating scripture.  The story of Jesus begins with Creation {although, some Jesse trees, I found, have even begun with "eternity":  God existing before everything else...but, I figured, you could include that into the account of Creation} and leads to December 25th, where you unwrap baby Jesus lying in a straw bed!  

To me, the concept of opening Jesus on Christmas day, after opening all previous ornaments and reading the scripture of His awaited first coming, will simulate {just a smidgen} of the anticipation and EXCITEMENT(!) that the Jewish nation felt when the promised Messiah had finally arrived!!  

How can you have one of these, you say?  

I'm glad you asked...  

I have done a ton of research on this thing, and let me tell you, the quality of scripture seemed to be lacking.  I had to collaborate a lot of the information I found in order to create the ornaments and collect scripture that properly represented {in my mind, anyway} the heritage of Jesus.

First, go get a tree.  Any kind of tree.  Whatever kind of tree you like best.

Next, download and print up the ornament images and scripture references {located below}.  Adorn and embellish.  As much or as little as you like {or have the time for}.  Note:  Some of the ornaments I've seen on the web are beautifully elaborate!  If I had the time and money to make them 3D and colorful, I would.  But who has time these days?  {If you do, I'll just call you lucky...}

Last, wrap up the ornaments and begin a meaningful tradition in your home!

Free printable ornaments 

and scripture references:
(click on images to download)

Ornaments - page 1

  

Ornaments - page 2

Ornaments - page 3

Ornaments - page 4

Ornaments - page 5

Click HERE for the Scripture References



Here are some additional pictures, ideas, and information:

(click on an image to be directed to it's website)

                         

       

And a bonus:

Ann Vonskamp has written and provided 

a FREE Jesse Tree Advent Devotional e-book

on her site, A Holy Experience.

{I wish I had known about this when I was putting mine together!}

I hope you enjoy as you {intentionally} keep CHRIST in Christmas!

Psalm 145:5-10

 

On the glorious splendor of Thy majesty, and on Thy wonderful works, I will meditate.  And men shall speak of the power of Thine awesome acts; and I will tell of Thy greatness. They shall eagerly utter the memory of Thine abundant goodness, and shall shout joyfully of Thy righteousness.  The LORD is gracious and merciful; slow to anger and great in loving-kindness.  The LORD is good to all, and His mercies are all over His works.  All Thy works shall give thanks to Thee, O LORD, and Thy godly ones shall bless Thee.

i'm irritated with you

The Lord has really been challenging me lately.  He has been teaching me a lot about my role as a wife and mother through many sources, avenues, books, and people.  And that would be the reason for my lack of consistency on this here blog.

I love writing.  There's something about getting your thoughts down in black and white.  To see them materialize before your eyes.  To understand, more clearly, what goes on inside.  To be honest with yourself.  To prove {or disprove} your sanity.  To inspire others.    

However, I don't love it more than my husband.  Or my children.

And I've found myself becoming irritated when I cannot get to my blogger dashboard.  I become consumed by blogging titles, subjects and content.  Or, if I'm already there, I become annoyed with the endless interruptions due to their endless needs.  

But are their 'endless needs' the problem?

The thought came to me the other day: 

When I focus on my family as my main ministry to the Lord, 
they no longer interfere with my to-do list, but BECOME my to-do list.

To answer the question:  no.

It's my priorities that are my problem.

They aren't making the top of my list.  And they should be.  THEY are my ministry which God has given me to fulfill.  And if I fail to fulfill those God-given roles...I've failed completely.

And if you've read any good portion of this blog, you'll soon realize I'm a {recovering} perfectionist.  Failure is not an option.

My home should be a haven.  And if I'm not expending most of  my energy and resources to provide that for my family, then what is the point of my life.  What's the point of this blog if I'm not actively engaged in enjoying the harvest?

It begins with me.  My thoughts.  And seeing those thoughts here, materialized, I can be completely honest with you.  Blogging needs to take a back seat.  I'll get to it when I can.  But from this moment on, I'll be obsessing over them. 

I'll see you around soon.  Because right now, I'm feeling irritated by this blog.  

There's a little person that needs some tending to....I can hear a sweet little voice, calling Mommy...and she needs me...

18 ways a wife may be the glory of her husband

1. Ask your husband, "What are your goals for the week?"
2. Ask your husband, "How can I help you to accomplish these goals?"
3. Ask your husband, "Is there anything I can do differently that would make it easier for you?"
4. Be organized with cleaning, grocery shopping, laundry and cooking.  As you fulfill your God-given responsibilities, your husband is then free to do his work.
5. Save some of your energy everyday for him.
6. Put him first over the children, your parents, friends, jobs, ladies' Bible studies, etc.
7. Willingly and cheerfully rearrange your schedule for him when necessary.
8. Talk about him in a positive light to others.  Do not slander him at all, even if what you are saying is true.
9. Do whatever you can to make him look good, to accomplish his goals.  Some examples are offer to run errands for him, organize your day to be available to help him with projects, pray for him and make good suggestions.  Give him the freedom not to use your suggestion, and do not be offended if he does not follow it.
10. Consider his work (job, goals, hobbies, work for the Lord) as more important than your own.
11. Think of specific ways that you can help him accomplish his goals.  Examples are get up early in the mornings to help him get off to work having had a good breakfast, take care in recording telephone messages for him, anticipate any needs he may have in order to attain a specific goal, and keep careful records of money spent to keep up with the budget.
12. Consider the things that you are involved in.  How do they glorify your husband (1 Corinthians 11:7-9)? Ask his guidance.
13. Be warm and gracious to his family and friends.  Make your commitment to him obvious to them.
14. Do and say things that build him up instead of tear him down.
15. Dress and apply your makeup in an attractive manner that is pleasing to your husband.
16. When your husband sins, reprove him privately and gently, always giving him hope and pointing him to the Lord.
17. Encourage him to use his spiritual gifts in ministry.
18. Realize that just as God is glorified when man obeys Him, your husband is glorified when you obey your husband.

The question always comes up, what if your husband is not a Christian?  What if he is not glorifying the Lord?  I'm reminded of a story that my grandmother told me once about her parents.  They were born around the time of the Civil War.  Apparently, her mother was a Christian and her father was not.  Reflecting back, my grandmother told how her mother always wanted to please him.  In order to please her husband, she was gentle and kind, and cooperated in all of the many relocation moves they had made.  Her usual answer when he requested something was, "Yes, Dad."  She did not complain or grumble.  She seemed to go gladly along with him in his plans.  Even when she differed, she still respectfully supported him.  I asked my grandmother, "How did your father treat your mother?" and she said, "He adored her."  Well, my great-grandfather may not have glorified Christ but my great-grandmother did by magnifying her husband, by living  out the role that God intended for her.  A special blessing for her was how her husband treated her and loved her.  You see, a Christian woman can do the right thing and fulfill her God-given role regardless of whether her husband fulfills his or not.

-Martha Peace, The Excellent Woman, pgs 55-56

just stay calm

Ecclesiastes 10:4

If the anger of the ruler rises against you, do not leave your place, for calmness will lay great offenses to rest.

Another translation:  Calmness can lay great errors (against you personally from an authority-figure) to rest.

“Sometimes I panic and first resort to belittling myself (or others) when I’m faced with a problem or crisis.”  - Joan C. Webb

I recently had a difficult time when an individual accused me of being a “lesser Christian” because of a certain choice I had made.  Did this make me a bad person?  Do I not appear Christ-like?  I thought my choices were innocent – however, this person was highly offended.  Initially, I was not sure how to respond.  But I knew that “blasting” that person was not the answer (no matter how good that would have felt).

Processing the proper response tore me apart.  Anger. Tears. Shame.

Was it OK? – Was it sin? – when one doesn’t want to initially respond in the correct manner?  Even though you knew you should respond right and you were doing your best to “get” there?  Even Jesus was tempted to sin.  He suffered as a result of that temptation.  He understands that feeling of weakness. But because he didn’t choose to succumb to that temptation, it was not sin.  

For because he himself has suffered when tempted, he is able to help those who are being tempted.  Hebrews 2:18

For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin.  Hebrews 4:15 

Processing the correct response isn’t sin.  It’s when you follow through with the incorrect one, is when it becomes sin.

Another question I had:  do all the “good” things I’ve done become instantly erased by one, seemingly innocent, choice?  Was that choice even really considered “bad”?  Verse 10:1 says {paraphrased} that one bad apple spoils the whole bunch:

Dead flies make the perfumer's ointment give off a stench; so a little folly outweighs wisdom and honor.

I was reminded that I am a sinner.  A part of the fallen creation.  Therefore, I cannot make a proper evaluation as to what is "good" or "bad".  God is the author of morality.  His wisdom on these matters spans much farther than mine.  Meaning that the choices I make {despite my opinion} may not be good.  Because, who am I compared to an all-knowing God?

I concluded the correct way to respond was to simply apologize to that person and leave it at that.

I gave no added explanation for the reasons behind my choice.

I offered no defense.

No arguments.

No attempts to force them to understand my side.

          --In spite of my {strong!} urge to “lay into” that person.--
Short and simple.
Calm as a summer breeze.

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I am grateful for God's love.  

I am grateful for Christ's redemption through the cross.  

I am grateful for the the Holy Spirit and His constant work in my heart in order to help me to discern between right and wrong.  

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